Journalist: I believe you have two failed marriages? Sally: No, that’s not correct. My first marriage lasted two years – it was successful. My second marriage lasted five years – it was also successful”. Media Interview with Melbourne fashion designer, Sally Browne,

How does anyone know whether a marriage is successful, but those two people who are married?Why should others judge someone else’s marriage by its duration? If Sally Browne and her current husband had lived in separate houses, would that have implied her marriage was successful? If, as statistics reveal, that one in three marriages end in divorce does that mean those that are sustained are  successful?I am not sure who said: Most women, it seems, like to marry at least once just to prove something to themselves or to society. It takes a stalwart to make the same mistake twice.Although statistics reveal that one out of two second marriages end in divorce, not as many divorced women are anxious to remarry. Many women, particularly those from marriages that have endured longer than ten years and have resulted in a satisfactory number of offspring, are not enthusiastic to pick up sox nor have to answer to a man again. They may own a smaller house, have a smaller disposable income and their holidays may not be as luxurious as during marriage but many say the tranquility, freedom and lighter workload more than compensates.

On the other hand divorced men need a woman to look after them and are usually remarried within two years. For a more specific view, let’s look at each female personality type separately. Each has different values therefore totally different views on marriage.

The Mummy’s Girl is pretty and feminine, adaptable. She is not ambitious but likes to be the boss’ pet. She brings out the protective instinct in others and especially in strong he-men like the Dad’s Boy personality type. She wants to be rescued from the boss-who-doesn’t-pay-her-enough-to-cover-her-credit-card-payrnent-each-month. She also wants to escape from mother’s apron strings.

The trouble with Mummy’s Girl is that she is never totally committed to her man or her marriage. She is always day-dreaming of, one day, her Prince Charming coming to rescue her from the rigours of housework and a critical husband. He usually does too and for some Mummy’s Girls, Prince Charming comes along repeatedly in different disguises) resulting in several marriages.”1′ve married a few people I shouldn’t have, but haven’t we all?”

The Daddy’s Girl personality type, efficient, well organised and successful is hard on herself and really needs a tolerant caring person like the Mummy’s Boy personality type. Her friends are surprised she marries such a wimp. “He’s not at all like her.” While he is useful, supportive amusing and good value he has a place in her heart, but once past the use-by date, she doesn’t waste time; she fires him like redundant baggage tossed out during spring cleaning. And feels only relief afterwards; relief that he is no longer a weight on her shoulders.”I’d die for you my love.” “Oh, Harry. You’re always saying that, but you never do anything about it.” Gloria Steinem

The Mother personality type who is motherly, nurturing and caring is dying to get married and have children. She chooses a man who will be good father material – The Brother personality type. She knows how to attract him, make him feel wanted and loved and has no trouble getting him to the altar. (They have to marry so that their children are legitimate). Usually she selects a man who stays permanently married. He enjoys family life and derives much pleasure from his children. The children are not the focal point of this marriage.

“I married beneath me. All women do.” Nancy, Lady Astor

The Sister personality type who is competitive, independent and inclined to leave her run a bit late is not keen to marry. She instigated the egalitarian marriage. The Bachelor personality type who also leaves his run even later eventually discovers her and they often marry within months of meeting. This marriage is usually very successful because they respect each others’ need for independence and space.

“The trouble with some women is they get all excited about nothing – and then marry him.” Cher

The Favourite Aunt personality type doesn’t need a husband. She is a great home maker, loves to run the household by herself without any interference and manages well on her own. The Playboy personality type is attracted to her. He wants a woman he can trust and she is completely trustworthy. Because she puts no pressure on him, he proposes before someone else does. Although never wildly enthusiastic, provided others don’t make it their business to inform her of her husband’s philandering, (although he will soon convince her it’s not true) she is content in her marriage.

“In Hollywood all marriages are happy. It’s trying to live together afterwards that causes all the problems.” Shelley Winters

The Flirt personality type needs an exciting man in her life and The Baby of the Family personality type believes that if he doesn’t marry this beautiful, vivacious and sensual woman, someone else will. Unfortunately she bores easily, which may lead to promiscuity or a change in husbands. Her husband who is usually a bit of a show off (part of the reason he married her), worries about what others think. He won’t be able to tolerate becoming a laughing stock in front of his friends. So like Prince Andrew, he will eventually throw in the towel if his flirtatious wife continues to stray.

“I know a lot a people didn’t expect our relationship to last – but we’ve – just celebrated our two month’s anniversary.” Britt Ekland

The Wife personality type chooses her man with great care. The Workaholic personality type must be worthy of her devotion. He must be successful and appreciate her support. She sets her prey and goes after him. She is a true predator but what a prize he gets; this woman is the perfect corporate wife, efficient, supportive, caring and devoted in every way. Her marriage is most often for life but should it end she will leave no stone unturned in her fury to find another husband. She is nothing without a man. To The Wife personality type, being without a man is like being without a job. “It is true that I never should have married, but 1 didn’t want to live without a man. Brought up to respect the conventions, love had to end in marriage. I’m afraid it did.” Bette Davis.

Rosalind Baker is the Principal and Founder of Entre Nous Introduction Agency www.entrenous.com.au and author of 3 best sellers, Dial A Woman, Dial A Man and Dial A Personality To find out: Your Personality Type, or to find out”Are You Eligible” or “Are you ready for a relationship?” visit: www.entrenous.com.au

Rosalind Baker is the Principal and Founder of Entre Nous Introduction Agency www.entrenous.com.au and author of 3 best sellers, Dial A Woman, Dial A Man and Dial A Personality To find out: Your Personality Type, or to find out”Are You Eligible” or “Are you ready for a relationship?” visit: www.singles.net.au

Rosalind Baker is the Principal and Founder of Entre Nous Introduction Agency www.entrenous.com.au and author of 3 best sellers, Dial A Woman, Dial A Man and Dial A Personality

To find out: Your Personality Type, or to find out”Are You Eligible” or “Are you ready for a relationship?” visit: www.singles.net.au

The present article has been read by many of our visitors and greatly appreciated. Hopefully you will enjoy it likewise. 

A virtual marriage certificate is a merriment way to convey your appreciation or love for someone without the dedication or time engagement of an actual wedding. Through use of online tools, you can propose, wed and even split up someone at the click of a mouse. Designed to be fun social tools, these services are non-legally binding, allowing couples to pretend they are wed. Click Here 

Getting a virtual marriage certificate is simple. Fill out a form with the proper information, and Submit it to the website. The website will then produce your certificate and either show it on your screen or email it to you. These certificates can be printed as as a keepsake or general amusement. 

If you need a real, valid marriage certificate, a virtual marriage certificate will not suffice. Due to the fact that it is done on the internet, no authorities will hold them as legal. They are meant for amusement purposes only. If you need a certificate for immigrations purposes, you will also have to prove that the relationship is valid, through support of friends and family, photographs and other evidence that it is a true relationship. While online dating is a very popular method of meeting people, online marriages will not be able to take the place of appearing in a courthouse, getting a proper license, and being wed. 

What a virtual marriage certificate can do for you is give you an idea if you are ready to tie the knot with someone, or go through a practice run at being virtually wed. This is flourishing in popularity, as divorce rates have increased enough that people are wanting to be more certain about whether or not they want to be wed. By participating in a virtual ceremony, you can enjoy the process of a marriage, which can help you prepare for the real thing. Some simulators are highly detailed, which make them extremely useful. As most simulators also include divorces, you can get an understanding of the personal effects of a divorce without having to really experience. Click Here 

If you are married and play with virtual marriage certificates with somebody online that is not your spouse, this can be used against you. It is recommended that if you are wed to someone legally, you avoid these venues. While the virtual marriage certificates are not lawfully binding, they can be viewed as extra-marital relationships, which can cause problems between you and your legal spouse. 

That’s all the information I have on the subject perhaps you may enjoy reading another article.

There are a lot of tasks to be completed when you are planning for your wedding. You will need to be very careful when you are doing the planning work. You should never overlook the tasks. As a matter of fact, wedding planning is never an easy task.
You may wonder why wedding planning is so difficult. You may also want to know what the items involved are. In fact, there are a lot of items you need to think about. The wedding favor, invitation, and reception hall are just some of the examples of them. Besides all these items, you will also need to plan for your honeymoon. You will need to at least confirm the air tickets in advance.
You will have a schedule for your wedding planning. It is not difficult to set the schedule. You may want to read some bridal magazines or visit some online wedding forums in order to get some tips to set your schedule. You will need to list all the items involved. You will also need to layout the budget of them.
One thing you need to remember is to stick to your pre-set schedule. A lot of couples just fail to stick to the schedule. However, you will just ruin your wedding plan if you cannot really stick to it. For example, your guests may not have the time to reply you if you send the invitation too late. As a result, you must go back to your schedule from time to time. You are doing that in order to make sure that you will be working according to your schedule.
You should use a notebook or a diary to keep track of your own planning schedule. Of course it is totally fine for you to put the data in the computer. As a matter of fact, a lot of couples will find it more convenient to store the data in the mobile phone since it is already a very powerful computer. The advantage of this is that you will bring along with your mobile phone everyday and it will be very easy for you to keep track of your schedule. However, you should remember to backup the data from time to time. You will just lose everything if you lose your mobile phone.
In fact, you do not just use your mobile phone for keeping track of your wedding planning schedule. It can also be a useful tool when you are doing your research. In most cases you can take photos with your cell phone. When you visit a wedding vendor, you may take photos of the items you love and this will help you a lot when you are making your final decisions. However, you will need to make sure that you are allowed to take photos of the items.
Remember, you should start planning for your wedding as early as possible. This is because wedding planning is a time consuming job. If you have enough time to do so, the chance is that you will be planning a more wonderful event!

FAILED MARRIAGES: ONE DIVORCE, TOO MANY. BY CHRIS OKAFOR

Marriage is an act of joining a man and a woman together in a holy matrimony as husband and a wife. It often calls for fun fares, weddings, celebrations and conviviality.

People spend a lot of money in planning for these big occasions and sometimes end it up cruising around the world on honeymoon. The couples had, without doubt, in church and in present of a Reverend Father, vowed to be faithful and to love one another until death do them apart. To most people who had partaken in this vow, it must be upheld with respect and dignity at all times. They sees marriage as a sacrament while to many, there is absolutely nothing wrong with saying “I do” today and within the next 4 months, it is all over.

This school of thoughts viewed the entire institution of marriage as “free-entry-free exit” kind of a contact. It doesn’t matter if their well publicised and celebrated marriage would come to a halt within months of its inception.

On the other hand, divorce or dissolution of marriage is the ending of marriage or marital vow before the death of either spouse. It can be contrasted with annulment, which is a declaration that marriage is void, though the effect maybe recognised in such unions such as spousal supports, child custody and distribution of property.

The problem of failed marriages and divorce around the world particularly Europe and America is so enormous and inexplicable especially when there is no basis to determine necessary or sufficient causation. It is, indeed, a social problem with a hereditary attachment of which many are completely ignorant of and never believe in existence of the following concept which I am going to outline here. When one decides to put an end to his/her marriage on a mere provocation and on issues that ought to be resolved amicably, you have no moral justification to tell your children in future that there is anything wrong with divorce or having children with different parents.In Nigeria, for instance, there are some ethnic groups that advise their male children never to marry from a single parent or a broken home. The ironic reasons are palpable. They believed that marriage is all about tolerance and the woman being submissive to their chosen husband at all time and therefore no amount of disagreement between couples that would warrant a woman to abscond from home. In most cases, men reserve the exclusive right to send their wives out of their matrimonial home on the ground of infidelity and promiscuity.

Women are normally the victim and in contrast, because of male dominance, cultural and religious affiliations, it is customary for people in most African countries to come back home from their respective daily activities and announce to their wives that they are marrying the second or the third wife as the case may be without questioning. They have the sole right as well to have as many girlfriend(s) as it pleases them or go out and come back at will.In fact, it is not only a taboo but it is also an abomination for average African woman to go out like their European or American counterparts, get drunk and have a one night stand that often lead to pregnancies. Such women would possibly be disgraced before their children and sent packing from home without compassion of any kind.

This is liken to ” if you cannot stand the heat get out of the kitchen” kind of marriage which have been viewed in some quarters as some kind of slavery. The truth of the matter is that some of these women knew what it meant to them for their children to be jointly raised and as such, they choose to stand the heat rather than getting out of the kitchen. The respect to their chosen husbands, no matter what he does or did is total and it is fundamentally important that they do not bring shame to their respective family no matter how wretched, poor or rich that family may be.

Recent research has shown that the evolution of marriage has taken place despite an increased life expectancy that has theoretically made a longer and healthier life together as a couple possible. Although in the past, the death of one of the two spouses was the typical end of marriage, divorce is now the most frequently observed cause.In Switzerland, for example, the number of newly divorced residents actually exceeded the number of newly widowed residents in 1988 (OFS, 1990).

This is a relatively recent phenomenon, having existing for less than half a century and even less in some countries where it was forbidden or severely restricted until very recently (The mid 1970s in Portugal and Italy, 1981 in Spain, and not until 1997 in Ireland). Divorce is not only a legal instrument freeing a couple from wedlock, but an act that is at the heart of familial and social processes.To understand the rise in the number of divorces in various countries, one must first understand the reasons causing couples to marry. France, Italy, Sweden, and Switzerland are representative of the diversity of marital and familial situations existing in Europe.What we see sometimes in American reality television is an eye saw. An unacceptable situation where one is married and within 3 months, the man is sleeping with his wife mother. There is no basis of comparison between African marriages and other people around the world because what they see as a way of life is completely forbidden in Africa. Again, most people see this as being totally primitive.

It is difficult for average women in Europe generally to stick to their marriage when they eventually realized that their husbands are cheating on them. That would invariably be the last straw and would be used as an affront to divorce in which they would be beneficiary to their husband’s stupendous wealth and without recourse to how such separation would affect their children.The ratio is 1 out of every hundred and we have seen this ratio at work sometime ago when a footballer wife defiantly resisted their former assistant shameless confession in order to thwart her marriage. She chooses to stand firmly by her husband throughout the trying period. In United States, during Bill Clinton era, a similar newspaper unconfirmed report between Bill and a Monica Lewinski almost ruin the marriage between the then president and his wife. Again, the latter choose to remain with the husband rather than divorce.

This is just one in a million and like a reoccurring decimal, one hardly turns the pages of newspapers these days without reading about ones divorce or the other. There are countless number of lawyers placing adverts on newspapers and magazines for cheap divorce rates.Today, one of the primary reasons why most celebrities cannot marry is that they are not ready to let what they have laboured all their entire life to be given to a nitwit in the name of divorce settlement .It is quite obvious that people go into marriage for number of reasons while some people, most especially women, go into marriage for the financial gains not really because they needed a family.

According to Jenny Burley and Francis Regan, the Irish story of family law reform in the post-second world war era is quite different from the experience of other countries. One of the main reasons why the story is different is that from 1937 divorce was banned under the Irish constitution. Divorce law reform therefore required a referendum to change the constitution. Even though there were thousand of separated people in Ireland in early 1980s, the proposal to introduce divorce was vociferously opposed in referenda in 1986 and 1995.

The opposition to constitutional change was fuelled by anti-divorce campaigns which used fear tactics, related to money, children, property and inheritance to argue that divorce would tear apart the very fabric of Irish society. The campaign also claimed that divorce would open floodgates to marriage breakdown. The availability of this divorce in Ireland since 1997 has not, however, borne out of dire predictions of the anti-divorce campaigners.Successful and failed marriages have its origin and background from family circles and some people has argued that it would take a divine intervention for the products of broken homes to triumph where their parents have failed. This is simple. Children learn a great deal from the good and the bad we do at home.

What are responsible for most ignominious exit in most marriages particularly from most women are sheer greed, drink and drugs, insatiable lust and lack of tolerance, which unavoidably, is contributing immensely to the drastic decadence in family and societal values.The devastating effects of divorce on children and families are enormous. Research made by Dr.Todd.E Linaman on families noted the following:Future effects of divorce• Children deal with the effects of divorce not only as children, but into adulthood. The effects of divorce will impact the next generation of children as well. • The child’s suffering from the effects of divorce does not reach its peak at the time of the divorce and then level off. Rather, the emotional effects of divorce can be played and replayed throughout a child’s life. Academic effects of divorce• Children from divorced families drop out of school at twice the rate of children from intact families, and they have lower rates of graduation from high school and college. • Children from divorced homes performed more poorly in reading, spelling, and math and repeated a grade more frequently than did children not facing the effects of divorce. Social effects of divorce• Children of divorced parents are significantly more likely to become delinquent by age 15, regardless of when the divorce took place, than are children not dealing with the effects of divorce. • The single best predictor of teen suicide is parental divorce and living in a single-parent household. • Comparing all family structures, drug use in children is lowest among children not facing the effects of divorce. Emotional effects of divorce• Divorce has been found to be associated with a higher incidence of depression; withdrawal from friends and family; aggressive, impulsive, or hyperactive behavior; and either withdrawing from participation in the classroom or becoming disruptive. • Adult children of divorced parents experience mental health problems significantly more often than do the adult children who didn’t witness the effects of divorce as children. Relational effects of divorce• After divorce, children tend to become more emotionally distant from both parents. • As adults, children of divorced parents are half as likely to be close to their parents as are children not dealing with the effects of divorce. • In their own marriages, children of divorced parents are more likely to be unhappy, to escalate conflicts, and to reduce communication with their spouses. • Some studies concerning the probability of divorce for children of divorced parents have found the risk to be more than twice the risk for children who haven’t personally experienced the effects of divorce.This is just one of the numerous factors affecting divorce on families and the list is endless. One thing about people that I have met in my life is that they do not realize the impact of the mistake they must have made in terms of making a decision that would ultimately shape their life until such mistake begin to hit them. It is, however important amidst these factors that we should think very carefully before considering divorce.Chris OkaforGalway Ireland: chrisokafor@myself.com